mmmmmriley

Back on May 7, we had a little shindig at the house. It was good times and lots of drinking. Anyway, on that day a couple flies got into the house. No big, it's just a couple of flies.

Well a month later it's a kabillion little flies. We've killed so many flies over the past month, and no matter how many we kill we find exponentially more a couple days later. At least our bug spray smells very nice. Ugh, I hate flies. hate hate hate.

2nd thing. I took Lex back to her apartment today and rider got out. Whatever, he's harmless. But just before Rider escaped, this meth-head looking white trash lady comes out with her 2 medium sized dogs. Yes, I said medium sized-top of the head about 2 feet off the ground with actual legs and a curb height ground clearance. Ms WT comes out of her door and looks to the right and says "oh fuck" when she looks down the back stairs. Then she looks our way to the stair's we're about 10 feet from and gets a pissy look on her face. She takes her dogs down the stairs and is down in the parking lot when the door to the apartment and Rider bolts out. and by bolt I mean goes the top speed a morbidly obese weenie dog can go-slow. As soon as the lady hears me calling for Rider and saying "No Rider! Get back here, Rider!" she starts to scream. Rider's plopping his fat ass down the stairs and is a good 15 feet away from the lady when she starts screaming "get off of me! Leave my dogs alone!" and acts all panicked. Lame. So I'm running down the stairs to catch Fatty McGee because verbal commands aren't working and he's out of my eyesight for about 2 seconds or less when I see the lady and the 3 dogs again. Rider is happily trotting behind them a good 2 feet trying to go for a walk. Meth head lady says, "that dog just attacked me and my dogs!" and was frantic and running away. sure sure. I scooped up the fat fuck of a dog because he's worn out from walking down the stairs and chuck him back in the apartment. whatever. I shag ass out of there because I'm starving and want to get home to my ham sandwich. I'm wondering what she's going to do about this situation because she swears that she and her bigger dogs were attacked by an elderly and morbidly obese ankle biter. Seriously?! stupid bitch.

So here's what I wanted to tell her and didn't because I was too hungry to care-if you see a slow moving weenie dog coming towards you and your dogs, what your reaction should be is
1.) laugh. wiener dogs are comical animal, especially fat
2.) if you're scared he will hurt your dogs then pick them up and get them out of harms way, if they are too large to be picked up then I'm pretty sure your dogs are not in danger.
3.) get on the curb of climb a stair, he can't get you waaaay up there
4.) kick at him, your shoe is at his face level before you get it off the ground, instant weenie-dog deterrent. Nothing above your achillies heel is at risk regardless
5.) walk faster-those 2 inch long legs and belly dragging the ground can not compete with your adult human strides.

I hate people. weenie dogs are awesome

I'm super excited right now. My sister is drawing my Bestie and I with our Patronuses(patroni?) and I can't wait. hehe. now you're stuck doing it, dove! It's HP related so it's not outside of your expertise. Work has been long, getting worn out but I still want/need both jobs. ugh.

having fun being a fangirl with my BFFF like all the time, it's awesome. Speaking of fangirl, ahem, luvscharlie, maybe YOU can convince my sister to do Me and Meg with our patroni...and put Jared in there with his moose too :O) we'd love one with just the 2 of us, but she can throw in a giant boy too to appease 2 squealy fangirls.

People are such assholes! My daddy owns his own heating and air company. As y'all know it's been hotter than balls around here lately so they've been getting a lot of business...but not good business. He and his people go out and do the work, and they usually get paid with credit card or check, and most of them bounce or dispute the credit card charges. That is so dick! That's 100% theft, but they get away with it and daddy loses money. If I were him, I'd go back and break their shit! haha. Fuck you bitch, your check bounced and cost us money and the cost of your repair, no a/c for you! Just because it's a business doesn't mean they don't have bills to pay! poor daddy :( he works so hard and just can't catch a break

Been too busy to visit LJ much, and the app I got kinda sucks. I've got to make appointments with my primary care doc, shrink, urologist, and gyno. Am I 50 years old yet? jeez. I saw my GI in Feb so I'm ok in that dept until I decide to get pregnant, then she says I have to get my colonoscopy before I make a baby. oh drama drama drama.

oh great, none of them can see me till june, what a crock. ugh,. oh well, gonna get in trouble at work for not having a dr's note for saturday. I went to work sunday and I know why I couldn't saturday, but for some reason they want a dr note. argh

I'm seriously getting even more fucking giddy about this wedding! I didn't think i could! There's no stress, just lots of giddy. I have my dress in the closet and it's awesome. I made my garter but I'm going to do the real one in the right colors and with higher quality materials...and bigger for my fat legs. I'm getting excited about picking out shoes for the girls and getting my hair done to see what I like. I love my bridesmaids! I can't wait to see Josh in a tux! eeee. squeeeeeeeee. And I'm totally not stressed because we already did the dang civil union. I can concentrate on just making this ceremony perfect

I need to get an ashtray for the back porch for our smoking visitors. But it's gotta be the most fucking awesome ashtray ever. now I just have to find that ashtray. any ideas? anyone out there got the skills to make one and the creativity to make it awesome?

ETA: this one is pretty cool
http://www.amazon.com/Celtic-Ashtray-Collectible-Decoration-Figurine/dp/B002I0VIJM/ref=reg_hu-rd_dp_img

I just had a thought.
Jason Behr would have made the best fucking Gambit EVER!
Damn you, casting director, why didn't you think of him? I'm tired of him only making shitty B-grade horror films; his beautiful face needs to be all up in the mainstream.
Now where the hell did my Behr bondage userpic go? argh

I get to deliver pies in 30! yay.
good day. such a good day.
Neville! I need a good Neville icon

I've been officially for a whole week now. Still feelin' fine.
I've been cooking meals for myself like crazy. I couldn't do it when we were together because he didn't like anything that wasn't deep fried, and I prefer slightly healthier foods...smothered in cheese.
I do miss frolicking around the house in my drawers, but I'm doing great considering, ya know, the whole "this was it he was the one" thing. Joy!

One more 12 hour day of work and I'm off for 3! I need some 4th plans.

Kickboxing tomorrow after work (my fat ass will be on the ground within 5 minutes I'm sure)

Nice weekend alone with my beloved little Bowser.